So I’ve finally got time to sit down and write an update. But what shall I say?
Life is busy, but predictable. Working, talking to my girl, working some more, stealing time to write when I’ve got a free hour or two, which isn’t often. Struggling to keep on top of everything, but feeling like there’s not all that much of which to keep on top. Mainly I’m just tired.
The fibromyalgia is back in full force. Fatigue and pain mark my days, and a good day is when I’m only at a 3 on the pain scale. I can’t remember the last time I truly didn’t hurt all day long. But trying to get doctors to talk to each other between states is like trying to scale Mount Everest in shorts and flip-flops, so it’ll take a while to get it straightened out.
On the other hand, I love Portland. Moving here was the best decision I ever made for myself. In this city, I feel at home. I am beginning to explore what it means to be myself, in a city big enough to handle my oddities. Everyone in Portland is odd, what’s one more? I didn’t miss the rain of the Pacific Northwest, but living with the rain is worth it because here, I have opportunity to be myself without ever feeling like I have to tone down or hide.
April 17th was two months since moving here. In that time, I’ve begun to put together a life. A job, a roof over my head, food on my table, a girlfriend, people who read and appreciate my writing, roommates who I get along with well… what more could a twenty-something ask for? I’m proud of myself. I’m proud of my ability to survive. I’m proud the city didn’t eat me. I don’t know if this is where I’ll be forever– who can say what the future holds?
But this is where I need to be right now, and I’m so lucky to have the opportunity to be here and make it work.
So thank you, friends, readers, family members– thank you all for supporting me while I made an incredibly bold move in my life, and found where my heart was waiting for me. I promise to try to update more frequently, as requested by a few of you